Happy Friday..just for fun

Three Friends Go to Heaven

After dying in a car crash, three friends go to
Heaven for orientation. They are all asked the same
question: "When you are in your casket, and friends
and family are mourning over you, what would you like
to hear them say about you?"

The first guy immediately responds, "I would like to
hear them say that I was one of the great doctors of
my time, and a great family man."

The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was
a wonderful husband and school teacher who made a
huge difference in the children of tomorrow."

The last guy thinks a minute and replies, "I guess
I'd like to hear them say, 'Look, he's moving!"



Nobody was available


I heard about this man that lived in a country

One night he heard some noise, and he saw some burglars stealing things from his barn.

He ran to the phone and dialed 911, but the dispatchers said: "I am sorry sir, there are no patrol cars available.
You just have to lock your doors and we'll get somebody there as soon as possible."


He hung up so frustrated. About 30 seconds later, he called back and said: "mam, don't worry about it, you dont need to send anybody. I shot all the burglars with my gun"

90 seconds later, 3 patrol cars, 2 ambulances and the sheriff all came. And they caught the burglars red handed.

A moment later, the sheriff went to the man and asked: "I thought you said, you shot all the burglars...."

The man said: "I thought you said, nobody was available...."